Piecing Us Back Together
by JAGfreak
Summary: An alternate end to "Death At The Mosque", what might have happened if DPB had gotten the stick out of his butt.


**Title: Piecing us back together...**

**Author: JAGfreak aka Ashlee**

**Rating: G or K**

**Disclaimer: I don't own it and I don't want to! DPB has already screwed ****everything up. **

**A/N: Well, I know lots of people have taken a stab at writing an ****alternate ending to Friday's episode..and I thought I'd take one as well. ****Mine is a bit different however than the rest...this might have actually ****happened if DPB had removed the stick from his butt. It's not all sappy ****and the perfect ending...b/c nothing with Harm and Mac is that simple.. ****things are complicated, granted they make it that way...but anyhow, ****please review and tell me what you think.**

**oh yeah, Mac's POV...

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**St Vincent Hospital**

**"Don't.." his words echoed in my thoughts and bounced around ****my head, ricocheting back into my line of thought. It had been 20 minutes, ****24 seconds...and still it stung like the words had just been given life. I ****cursed myself silently for being so affected...for ALLOWING myself to ****be so upset and hurt. **

**I hadn't left...not yet atleast. Something kept me there..pulled ****me like an invisible magnetic force, denying me my escape. I had walked ****away, gotten into the elevator, and rode quietly down to the main floor ****and lobby of the hospital. I had my keys in hand, and was headed for ****the door...when I couldn't bring myself to leave. **

**So here I am...sitting in a chair, watching as people come in and ****go out, and oh how I envy those people...they are able to leave...but I ****cannot...why? Out of some sense of loyalty to a friendship that in all ****honesty, barely exists? I clutch the keys in my hands a bit tighter..****telling myself that any second now I will find the strength to leave.**

**'You must have lost your mind, Mackenzie.' I tell myself..because ****if I was in my right mind I would of left by now...sanity has fled from ****me...and I so desperately want it back..need it back. I need to leave ****this place. But, still...I cannot move. **

**I stare down at the keys in my hand, toying with them, fidgeting ****nervously. I know that if I keep thinking of the way he reacted when ****I touched him I would surely start crying. 'he didn't want you to touch ****him...' an inner voice taunts me, and I don't have the strength to argue.**

**I let my thoughts wander and begin to try to pinpoint where we ****went wrong. There was a time when I believed we'd always be close...****we'd always be that dynamic duo...inseparable and invincible. A sad ****smile graces my lips, there was a time when we were all those things..****but that time had passed...long since passed if I was honest with ****myself. **

**Things had changed...we had changed. But that doesn't mean ****that our friendship couldn't have changed with it...we just let it slip..****but ..God help me, I still think we can get it back...piece it back ****together again. Maybe that's why I was here...to start repairing ****what we had let break...a little at a time...piece by piece. But ****that couldn't be done if every time one person fixed a piece, the other ****would break it again. That's what we had been doing for so long...and ****it was MORE than time for that to stop. **

**I had drove over four hours to be with him...to support him, ****I didn't believe the superman mask he tried to wear as being the true ****Harmon Rabb, Jr. He had weaknesses...he was human. Mattie is like ****a daughter to him...she taught him so much about love, about life. ****Harm is a different person for having known her, the kind of man ****who would want me even if I couldn't have his children. Who wouldn't ****love me any less because I couldn't...**

**Idon't know what Harm wants out of this relationship...****friendship...if it can even be called one of those things the way things ****have been. I can't tell what he is thinking...but I know he is pushing ****me away...but forget relationship for a moment, he is my friend...and ****though he won't believe me, I still consider him my best friend. No man, ****heck..NO ONE..has ever been there for me more than Harm has... he has ****understood me more...has loved me more despite all the faults he has ****come to know about me. **

**I stare off into space...and I make my choice. I'm going back ****up there...not because of anything having to do with an "us"...not ****because of a sense of loyalty to a friendship I once HAD...but for the ****friendship we DO have, however tentative...that can only get stronger if we both stop ****trying to pretend we don't need eachother...and we both start being ****honest. I won't let him be alone tonight...I am his friend, Sarah ****Mackenzie, and that's what friends do..I don't care if he doesn't ****want me here...because damn it, I'm staying. **

**I get up, grab my ****coat and head for the elevator...preparing myself for whatever ****reaction that comes my way. **

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**ICU**

**Harm's POV**

**I hear footsteps coming down the hall, headed my way.. but ****I don't look up. I still have my head buried in my hand. I hear ****someone sit quietly down beside me, and Mac's perfume invades my ****senses...**

**'what is she doing here?' I think angrily. I thought I had ****made myself pretty clear. **

**I look up and she is looking straight ahead, ****arms folded across her chest...a determined look in her eye.**

**"Mac..what are yo.." I start, but she interrupts.**

**"I'm staying Harm..." she turns to look at me...a sad look on ****her face, her eyes lock onto mine as she says softly "I'm staying..."**

**THE END**

**Please Review, rant about DPB, the show, whatever..lol. I'll take it all.**


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